"I can't think about that right now. If I do, I'll go crazy. I'll think about that tomorrow!" Famous words, spoken by one Scarlett O'Hara in Gone with the Wind. When I was growing up (which, at 25, I continue to do), I sincerely looked up to the heroines of my favorite books, many of whom are featured in Erin Blakemore's forthcoming The Heroine's Bookshelf: Life Lessons, from Jane Austen to Laura Ingalls Wilder.
From childhood through the growing pains of young adulthood, I often compared my experiences with those of Jo, Scarlett, and Lizzy. Depending on what I was going through, I found new inspiration each time. For example, when assessing a serious relationship that had ended, I found myself saying "I was always a Melly, never a Scarlett!" Rejecting a boy in college, I remembered Jo declining Laurie's offer of marriage (which years earlier, I had thought to be lunacy). When navigating adversity this summer, I strove to emulate Lizzy Bennet's loyalty to herself and her lightness of spirit.
So, in honor of The Heroine's Bookshelf hitting...well...bookshelves, I'm asking my readers to join in a little "Dear Abby" fun. Write in with a question for one of our heroines, and she will write back with words of advice in her own voice. Ask Scarlett what to do about the man you've been pining for (who happens to have a girlfriend), ask Jo if you should go to grad school, or ask Lizzy how to deal with an overbearing mother. Write in with a 20something question, and we'll solve your dilemma and send you a free book. Just shoot an email to roaring20s AT harpercollins DOT com, and be sure to check back throughout the month for more on The Heroine's Bookshelf!
Dear Lizzy,
As you have so much experience with dinner parties and etiquette, what would you have done in this instance?
I have two girlfriends, close in age, who move in the very same social circles. They are seemingly great friends, but one of them often leaves the other out when she sends out invitations to dinner parties and the like.
Another friend of mine is friends with both of these ladies as well, but we feel awkward when we know the other is not invited. Should we protect our friend from finding out that her "frenemy" didn't invite her, or should we be open about all our dealings in this matter.
Your sage advice is greatly appreciated.
Yours,
Heather
Posted by: Heather Drucker | October 12, 2010 at 04:22 PM
dear jo,
i'm sorry but i like you best. haha. so i have this boyfriend, who isn't so much a boyfriend anymore, who is moving to california sans me, leaving me with no other choice than to move on. here is the dilemma. there is a boy. a different boy. a boy quite different from the "boyfriend". he is really nice looking, and has been a friend for a while. i enjoy him, his company, his attitude, and generally most things about him. i will be seeing him after a grueling few months of not seeing him, this upcoming weekend. there is a chance that i will have to encounter the dramatic, ever-dreaded "two of them in the same room" situation. is it ok to ask said "boyfriend" (who is leaving & is no longer a boyfriend to me) to kindly not show to an event that would otherwise leave me awkward & emotionally torn?
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